Have you ever tried to bring the Good News to someone who seems sooooo ready, but just is not “there” yet?
I have a close relative who informed me two years ago that she was going to take her own life. She wanted me to be there with her when she did it and I said Absolutely Not. I told her I thought she was depressed and needed help. For the past two years I have done my best to love her and support her. And witness to her.
Most notably, she is still here. Praise God.
She claims to be an atheist, but she’s not. She is actually a very spiritual person in some ways. She has experimented with many different religions and rejected them all, but she keeps seeking “something” that she has not yet found.
These days when she is troubled she frequently asks me to pray for her, and I do.
I know that God is teaching me something – or many things. Patience is one of them. Faith is another – it is sometimes hard for me to have faith that He is in control. I feel like _I_ “must not be doing something right” or she would already have come to Jesus. I need to keep reminding myself that I will never save a single soul. God saves. I can only speak Truth.
Sometimes I get so exasperated, I want to say (and maybe someday I will), “Just who, exactly, do you think I am praying to when you ask me to pray for you anyway?” But the Holy Spirit has not yet led me to say that to her. I struggle every day to let Him lead this conversation and keep my own ego out of it.
Thank you God for using me as part of Your plan. Help me to do that as You intend. Amen.