I woke up last night with tears streaming down my face and talking out loud in my sleep, saying, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry! I’m so sorry!“
It took me a minute to realize that I’d been dreaming and now I was awake. And it took a little longer for me to remember what I’d been dreaming.
I was so overcome with the emotions from the dream that it took me even longer to recover enough equilibrium to be able to think about my dream.
In my dream I had already died and I was standing with Jesus, in total awe and elation at actually getting to meet Him in person. I was too awestruck to say anything but (in my dream…) Jesus had a look of sadness in His eyes and said, “I had such great plans for you but you were always too busy.”
I think that Dream was a warning.
I immediately started praying, first of all just in total gratitude for the gift of this dream and for actually giving me another chance to try to do better. I was bawling my eyes out … the first time I have actually literally cried while I was praying. A lot of the reason I was crying was in gratitude — that I’m not dead yet, and that I still have a chance to try to get it right. I also found myself pleading with God to show me what He wants of me and promising that I will listen harder and try to do whatever He asks of me.
What a (literal) Wake-Up Call!